幾則幽默雷人英語笑話
中間戰術 Midway Tactics
Midway Tactics
Three competing store owners rented adjoining(毗連的) shops in a mall. Observers waited formayhem(故意的傷害罪，蓄意的破壞) to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, Gigantic Sale! and Super Bargains!
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, Prices Slashed! and Fantastic Discounts!
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, ENTRANCE.
中間戰術
三個互相爭生意的.商店老板在一條商業街上租用了毗鄰的店鋪，旁觀者等著瞧好戲。
右邊的零售商掛起了巨大的招牌，上書：大減價!特便宜!
左邊的商店掛出了更大的招牌，聲稱：大砍價!大折扣!
中間的商人隨后準備了一個大招牌，上面只簡單地寫著：入口處。
如此長的狗 Such a Long Dog
Once there was a blind. One day when he was walking, he stepped the head of the dog who was sleeping. The dog barked for a while. The blind man went on for miles, this time he stepped the other dog's tail, so this dog barked. The blind man had thought that it was the first dog, so he said in surprise, It's a wonder that the dog is so long.
從前有個瞎子。一天，他正在行路時踩著了一只正在睡覺的狗的腦袋，狗汪汪汪地叫了一陣。這人又往前走，這回踩著的是另外一只狗的尾巴，狗又汪汪汪地叫起來。瞎子以為還是那條狗，驚詫地說：奇怪，這只狗可真夠長的。
區別 Difference
"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.
"When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."
“研究生班和本科生很容易就能區別開來，”在洛杉磯加利福利亞州立大學給我們研究生上工程學課的老師如此說。
“我說‘下午好’，本科生們回答說‘下午好’。研究生們則把我說的話記在筆記本上。”
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