幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)大全笑破你的肚子
他的劍鋒以一個(gè)巨大的弧線(xiàn)劃了下來(lái)--然而那只昆蟲(chóng)還在繼續(xù)飛行!觀(guān)眾被驚呆了。更多英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)盡在應(yīng)屆畢業(yè)生笑話(huà)網(wǎng)。
世界上最偉大的擊劍手：The World's Greatest Swordsman
At an exhibition of the world's best swordsman, the third-place fencer took the stage. A fly was released, and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second-place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman.
His blade came down in a mighty arc - but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.
Why are you so happy? someone yelled. You missed!
Ah, replied the swordsman, you weren't watching very carefully. They fly lives, yes - but he will never be a father.
世界上最偉大的'擊劍手
在一場(chǎng)世界最佳擊劍手表演中，排名第三的擊劍手上場(chǎng)了。一只蒼蠅放了出來(lái)，劍劃了一個(gè)弧，他將蒼蠅劈成了兩半。觀(guān)眾歡呼起來(lái)。緊接著排名第二的人將一只蒼蠅切成了四半。現(xiàn)場(chǎng)一陣沉默，人們期盼著世界上最偉大的擊劍手出場(chǎng)。
他的劍鋒以一個(gè)巨大的弧線(xiàn)劃了下來(lái)--然而那只昆蟲(chóng)還在繼續(xù)飛行!觀(guān)眾被驚呆了。最偉大的擊劍手完全錯(cuò)過(guò)了他的目標(biāo)，然而他還在微笑著。
你為什么這么高興?有人嚷道，你沒(méi)擊中!
啊，劍手答道，你剛才沒(méi)有很仔細(xì)地看。蒼蠅還活著，是的--但他永遠(yuǎn)也做不成爸爸了。
你爸爸幫你了嗎?
One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all his sums right. The teacher was very pleased-and rather surprised. He called Tim to his desk and said to him, You got all your homework right this time, Tim. What happened? Did your father help you?
No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself, said Tim.
你爸爸幫你了嗎?
一天，蒂姆的數(shù)學(xué)老師看了他的作業(yè)，發(fā)現(xiàn)他全做對(duì)了。老師很高興，同時(shí)也十分驚訝。他把蒂姆叫到桌前說(shuō)：蒂姆，你這次的作業(yè)全都做對(duì)了，怎么回事?你爸爸幫你做了嗎? 不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做了。
Fishing
Larry and Harry drove 500 miles to go fishing. They paid a huge sum to rent a cabin, a similar about to rent a boat. They fished for three days and caught only one fish between them.
On the way home, Harry fiddled with a calculator while Larry drove. After an hour, Harry said, Do you realize that this one fish we caught cost us almost $2,000?
Wow! Larry said, It's a good thing we didn't catch any more.
釣魚(yú)
拉里和哈里驅(qū)車(chē)500英里去釣魚(yú)。兩人花了一大筆錢(qián)租了一間小屋，又花了差不多同樣的錢(qián)租了一條船。兩人釣了三天，只釣到一條魚(yú)。
在回家的路上，拉里開(kāi)車(chē)，哈里撥弄著計(jì)算器。一小時(shí)后，哈里說(shuō)：你可知道我們釣的這條魚(yú)幾乎用掉我們2000美元?
哇!拉里應(yīng)答：幸虧我們沒(méi)有多釣到魚(yú)。
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